There are actual times when I think about deleting my blogg.
I know it sounds melodramatic, but it isn't at all actually.
It has nothing to do with hating blogger or whatever... it's simply because I feel like I'm sorta... too grown up for it? Which I know also sounds weird, because there are people my age blogging and even making hella cash out of it.

But now when I work as much as I do and do as many things as I do and evolve as much as I'm trying to do, it feels like I barely even have time for this blogg anymore. It feels like the few moments I waste on this are more or less stressed af because I still have a million other things to do, and writing a blogg is not high on that list currently. It feels rushed, and awkward, and displeasing all around I must say.
And being stressed seems to be a big part of being a grownup.

Maybe it's just me being anxious.

But maybe, just maybe, I'm not the blogger type of person anymore.
Maybe I haven't been for awhile.

Maybe, just maybe, it's time for me to focus on other greater things in life...


Songs that I've been listening to all day...

Beauty Hacks!

I do have a little time on my hands today that I decided to use for some 'good'.
So... I decided to share with you, my readers, some beauty-hacks that may or may not help you in your conquest for your own comfort and style and beauty.


Keep in mind that these hacks are MY hacks, meaning that they work for me. They may not on everyone and for some people it might even seem like more work than what their original beauty routine intended... either way... it's all in good fun and all tricks are worth a try if you're intrested. Just trying to help ya guys out, ya know?

1: Mixing moisturizer with primer.
Now... this trick is especially helpful if your skin is like mine (always thirsty) but you need a primer because... well, your foundation won't stay on for the rest of the day if you don't. Meh. Anyways, don't put a overly thick moisturizer into the mix (if you have to use one, then use it before putting on the primer mix), because... that's just not a good match. I use Celestial from Lush as my mixture moisturizer, and before that I put on a pretty heavy layer of Gorgeous (also from Lush). A perfect combo for now.

2: Mascara as eyeliner.
Alright, this is for people whom are more into the "barely there" eyeliner look, or with extremely hooded/aging eyes but they still want that cateye on point. What you do is that you take a tiny little nail-craft painting brush that is tiny enough for the wing you want, and then you just put it into your mascara and go to town. It's a pretty easy and fun thing to do to do all sorts of artistic things as well.
For example, during Halloween, I used a paint brush to get all the eyeliner decor I had across the sides of my face (but I used eyeliner for it because I wanted it glossy). The mascara trick is really good if you want that faded or" shadowed out" effect on your eyeliner.

3: Too old mascara.
Now... this is a problem that happens quite often when you really love mascara as much as I do, and you have my type of lashes (long and thick). Your mascara dries out eventually because you use it to often and leave it out too much. Oops.
Anyways. Marty has got the solution. In fact... I have two. 
One of them is to close your mascara bottle all nice and tight, and then you put it under scolding water for 10 minutes. And then you're done!
Another trick is to put a little contact solution into it. Or olive oil if you don't have that.

4: Light concealer to highlight
Ahh... this is my favorite trick.
When you've done your foundation and all of that, and it's time to use concealer, pick a lighter one than your natural skintone. Then you put it underneath your eyes, a little on your chin and even on the tip of your nose if you want. It's all about what you want to bring out on your face, because the lighter it is, the more you're bringing it forward. 
When you're as pale as me I suggest investing in a completely white concealer (yes, thy exist and they are awesomeeeeeeeee), but make sure to blend it out and not to leave it streaky. Okok?

5: Contour for pale af people
Now this is a tricky one for people as pale as I am, because we still want definition (most of us at least), but we don't want to be orange which is extremely hard because everyone IS SO MUCH DARKER THAN US. But here is a little trick I've learned that always work when I need a contour... 
Find a gray-based brown shade. 
hat may not even exist in the world of contour, but then you go for an eye-shadow.
Look how many choices you have now!!
And it works just as well. 

I think those are the only things I can come up with right now...
But I'll let you know if I can think of more~


So... I've been brought up to date with Criminal Minds again.
Which is currently quite the shitstorm I must say.

One of the actors left their role, which is rather unsurprising when you think about it. People have put a lot of time and effort into their roles and it's time for some of them to move on to bigger and greater things. Understandably so.
But yesterday I read some very disturbing things I must say.
The actor that portrays Hotch is actually fired from his job.
Huh. Would you look at that...
At this moment you may ask yourself why, and from what I gathered it's because he actually got into a physical fight with the director of the show, and as it turns out it was not the first time things have become... passionate, so to speak.
Now, the articles don't really mention who started what and how things went down into details, but needless to say the director decided it was time to let the actor go.

Then again, one articles claims that it's a suspension and not a permanent thing, but from the way things look right now... well it's not looking too good.

Which brings me to another point in this whole shitstorm.
I decided to scroll down comments made by people commenting on the articles and boy do I regret that. Worst decision so far.
The comment-section was littered with people telling the directors to "grow up" and that they "should put their big boy panties on" and "just let him do whatever he wants" (the last one meaning to let the actor do whatever he wanted) and dear God... I'm losing all hope in humanity.
All of it.
If someone beats you it's quite common sense that you get away from that person, isn't it?
Tell me... why should a grown man have to put up with another grown man beating someone up so that YOU get the cast you want in a show that HE creates? Fuck off. Seriously.
There is nothing grown up about being punched in the face and taking it with a stride. In fact it's way more grown up and mature of someone to know when a situation is out of hand and remove the source of that from your presence.
How fucking dare people tell victims to grow up and let someone punch them in the face?
When is punching someone in the face ever okay?


I loved Hotch. He was such an interesting character and I relate to a lot of his quirks and wisdom (I think he might be and INFJ but I'm not sure), but that will never excuse beating someone up for "artistic differences." I hope the actor gets the help he needs and that he can apologize for real one day, but for now... this is it for him.


I think people should give me a lot more credit for the shit I put up with.

Today I did stuff.
Important stuff for work.
Such as getting my past grades out and getting my police register thingie out as well.
Which won't be a shocker for anyone when I say that my grades were really good and my police register is clean af. That's nice, ain't it?

Other than that I'm slowly losing my mind.
But that's a fun story for another time I feel.

Saving the best for last and all that, ya know?

I'm currently not doing much. Trying not to think too much I suppose.
Snuggling wit dogs that I've just been out with for a veeeery long walk. Neither of them are complaining tho~


I also thought I should add to the whole 'waiting for babe to come home' thingie, in case you're wondering... this is all very new to me.

In this short amount of time I have experienced a lot with this person. More than I have with anyone before, which says a lot. Because I always think I have deep and meaningful connections with people (it's what I look for), but this... this is something very different.
And it doesn't feel wrong.

People whom know me (*stares intensely at friends*) know that my first reaction when it comes to feelings is to avoiiiiidddd them like a plague. Not so that they'll go away, but more like... so I don't have to talk about them? Yeah. That makes more sense.
But I talk a lot about my feelings now.
I'm kinda diving head into this without a parachute and it's thrilling and exciting and all kinds of weird at the same time, which I suppose you can understand. 

Tall Marty

Good evening, dears~
I felt like writing a little while waiting for babe to come home from work. She worked a pretty long shift today, and obviously late, so I doubt we'll talk too much but still... it's nice to be up and know that I can at least write her something encouraging.
She hates her job so much, and I can understand why.

So.. my introduction for work starts tomorrow.
Oh yeaaah. I might have actually forgotten to mention that.
I applied for a job as a private tutor, and I got it, so... that's where I'm at right now. Hopefully I will eventually make enough money to pursue my makeup artist dreams, but it might take some time. But as I've said before, I'll work hard for it and hope for the best.

I'm just kinda proud of myself because I actually realized my dreams.

Don't get me wrong. I quite enjoy being a teacher and all of that, but this... this is a dream. Somehow I get the feeling that once I've reached that dream, most of my issues will be solved. Maybe. Maybe that is wishful thinking as well, but alas... it is what it is and I'm willing to roll the dice right now.
Speaking of jobs, I'm also thinking about applying for some guard jobs. Like at pubs or whatever. Being this tall has it's perks, and also I apparently look domineering as heck... anyways. Tall Marty applying for more jobs. This is gonna be hella fun.


Adventures With Alfons

So I had a fun adventure yesterday...

To start this off I was going to the graveyard during the day. To go to a Pokémon stop. Because I ran out of balls a couple of days ago... Sooo...
Anyways. On my way there I saw this dog running around on the streets. He/She/It seemed completely lost, but there were dogs around so I figured that the family must be around there somewhere.

When I was at the cemetery all the sudden I saw this dog running straight up to me and my dogs, and refused to leave... I figured that I could just walk around and hopefully the owner would come along and find him (yes,  checked, it was a "him"). But the owner was a no-show so...
I decided to bring home home with me, call the police just to see if it had been any reports in about a missing dogs in the neighborhood. 

The Police said they were gonna call back if they found anything so I decided to just one last time walk around in the forest to see if the owner was around... Obviously the owner can't just have left him there. The dog had been cared for and nurtured and was very playful and nice to my dogs so... there was no possible way this was a dog that had been thrown out.
I saw a couple of old couples, which is very common here, and I asked them if they had lost a dog or if they knew someone that had lost a dog. Nothing.
I was walking down the road when I saw these young girls biking and I was about to stop them to ask the same question when I saw that one of them was on the phone, and me being the person I am just felt like it would be rude... also... they were kids.
Alas, that's when I heard the girl on the phone telling the other person on the other side of the call "No, we haven't found him yet."
That's when I turned around and very dramatically pointed at them both and yelled "ARE YOU GUYS MISSING A DOG?!"

So, needless to say...
The dog, Alfons, returned home all safe and sound. 



What a lovely child and what a lovely family. It's such a lovely thing that they have each other. It makes my heart flutter.